The latest trend in the mummy mafia of facebook is the ‘Motherhood Challenge’. I’m sure you’ve all seen it and at face(book) value it seems like a harmless and fun way to fly your Mummy flag, loud and proud. In case you haven’t seen it, here it is;
Motherhood Challenge: I was nominated to post 5 pictures that make me happy to be a Mother. I’m tagging 10 people that I think are great Mothers to post 5 pictures for the Motherhood Challenge! I will copy and paste this in the comments below for you. Here are my 5 pictures that make me happy to be a mother x
Now firstly, lets just mention that no, I haven’t been tagged by anyone. I’m either not in the top 10 greatest Mummies anyone knows (which is entirely possible and also ok) or the people who do see my value as a mum aren’t taking up the challenge. I love to post pics of my kids and often hash tag about how lucky I am. I also want to say that this isn’t at all an attack on any Mummy who has shared the post, its just a different perspective to consider. I do think that positivity and seeing the silver lining are wonderful and often essential traits and that those of us who have been able to become mothers are very lucky to have these little people.
My concern is that by constantly putting motherhood on a pedestal we are creating a very dangerous expectation that real motherhood just can’t live up to. In turn this makes it even harder for us to speak up and be honest about the real challenges we face, putting us in a competition of putting our best stepford Mums face forward, no matter what.
I read this article and it really hit home to me about the problems of the current facebook motherhood challenge! What is the purpose of this motherhood challenge? Why are we feeding into yet another form of mummy wars and still hiding the truth of our experience behind the illusion thst mother hood is perfection.
I have decided it is time for a real motherhood challenge, showing the real challenge of Motherhood in all its imperfect glory. Not a hilarious series of funny one off scenarios that we can all smile about while we say “lucky they are so cute #blessed”. No. I want to create something to show that it is in fact the struggles we overcome which we should be most proud of and that ‘the real motherhood challenge’ doesn’t have the shiny air-brushed face of a glossy magazine shoot at all. It has no instagram filter or witty hash tags. Real Motherhood challenges are made of pain, uncertainty, loss, grief, blood, sweat, tears, mud and lets face it, shit!
In the near future I am going to share some anonymous guest posts that show the many facets of the real motherhood challenge. I hope that this will encourage some honesty and help us to stop feeling so alone in our struggles of the real challenges of motherhood.